Finding Purpose.©

    The story begins in a small urban neighborhood in Malaysia, a place where most children grow up under the watchful eyes of parents who themselves are struggling to make sense of life. Born into a structured environment, most of us enter this world with expectations already laid out, often before we even take our first breath. Parents, well-meaning as they may be, tend to cast the shadows of their own dreams, fears, and desires onto us. The pressure to conform to these invisible scripts is not spoken aloud but rather woven into every interaction—every conversation about culture, religion, school, career paths, and social norms. I was especially atuned to this and often compared to what and how other children are and reminded constantly of what shame it would bring from those others should I transgress in some way. 

From the start, we’re told what life should mean. Parents, influenced by their own upbringing, encourage us to follow paths they believe to be tried-and-true: "Become a doctor," "Get good grades," or "Marry the right person (withing the circle)." These are the seeds that plant our early notions of purpose. As we grow, this narrative is reinforced by the voices of society and culture—advertisements that sell happiness through luxury cars and large homes, social media influencers who project an illusion of a perfect life, and educational systems that measure worth through grades and accolades rather than understanding or curiosity.

As the years pass, these voices blend into a cacophony that drowns out any genuine inquiry into life’s meaning, should you even dare to ask. We adopt goals that are not truly ours but borrowed—reflections of what society has deemed valuable. We pursue material wealth, career success, and social status, believing these are the markers of a life well-lived. But is this pursuit meaningful? Will it lead you to become a clown, broken inside? 

Many realize, often too late, that they’ve been running a race set up by others. They wake up one day, having achieved what they thought they were supposed to—maybe a prestigious job or a well-furnished home—only to feel a gnawing emptiness. A void that cannot be filled with promotions or a new car or even a relationship. And this emptiness drives some into existential crises, where the entire structure of their beliefs collapses.

Why do so many of us ignore the truth of a more meaningful existence? The answer lies in the nature of our conditioning. We are taught to look outward for validation, to measure our lives by external achievements. From childhood, we are rewarded for conforming and punished, even if subtly, for deviating. We’re not encouraged to look inward, to ask uncomfortable questions like, “What do I truly value?” or “What brings me real fulfillment?”

Instead, our society glamorizes ideologies—whether political, religious, or cultural. It encourages the adoption of ready-made belief systems that offer a sense of identity and purpose. But these ideologies, like wealth, are distractions that keep us from confronting the deeper truths within ourselves. Many humans fall into the trap of dogmatic thinking, investing their lives into beliefs that often serve more to divide than to unite. Ideologies become a fortress around the ego, shielding us from the uncomfortable reality that much of what we believe might not be our own thoughts but borrowed concepts.

Is humanity doomed to repeat this cycle of misguided pursuits and disillusionment? History would suggest so. Wars have been fought, lives lost, and civilizations risen and fallen, often because of humanity’s collective inability to see beyond immediate desires and surface-level truths. We seem programmed to repeat mistakes, not because we lack intelligence, but because we are conditioned to ignore the lessons of introspection. Our gaze is often focused on the external world, rarely turning inward where real growth happens.

The most important lesson in life is deceptively simple but profoundly challenging: the realization that meaning is not something to be found but something to be made. Meaning arises from our relationships, our passions, and the small acts of kindness we extend to others. It’s found in understanding and accepting the transient nature of life, embracing uncertainty, and being present in moments of joy and pain alike.

But this truth is easily ignored because it’s not convenient. It doesn’t offer a clear path or an easy formula for success. It requires a confrontation with oneself, a willingness to let go of the ego and societal expectations. It demands that we ask: “What kind of life do I want to live, even if it doesn’t align with the conventional idea of success?” And answering that question is hard, often requiring the dismantling of years, if not decades, of conditioning.

In the end, the purpose of life is not about accumulation but about connection—connection to others, to ourselves, and to the world around us. It’s about love, not the romanticized kind, but the deep, unconditional love that accepts people as they are and strives to be there for others in their time of need.

So, why do so many ignore this truth? Because to live authentically requires courage. It requires stepping out of the herd mentality and facing the potential loneliness that comes with choosing a path less traveled. Most are not ready to break away from the safety of societal norms. Yet, those who do often find a richness of experience that no amount of money or recognition can provide. They discover, they have enough!

It’s not that humanity is doomed to repeat its mistakes, but rather that most of us are afraid to change. We are afraid to face the uncomfortable truth that perhaps everything we thought we knew about life was merely an illusion. The real meaning of life is not hidden from us; it’s just overshadowed by the noise of superficial goals and ideologies. When we clear away the distractions, we find that life is, indeed, about truth, love, and being there for others—just as we would want them to be there for us.

But to see this, we must be willing to look beyond the surface, to dig deep, and to accept that the answers are not “out there” but within us all along. 

The Gentile!

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